May 25, 2011
I should be tired. I only slept about 5 hours last night and those were broken hours intermittently disrupted by my 11 month old. Here I sit at midnight, wide awake in the darkness, my mind spinning, revving, ready to go.
Is this the true definition of motherhood?
I spend my days caring for others completely with nary a moment to myself. At the end of the day, when the kids are tucked into their beds, the house is clean, the food put away all I want to do is stay awake in the silence and live MY life.
Maybe I am tired but I’m so busy focusing on myself and what I want that I don’t have time to be tired. We’ll see in the morning when I have to get up and make breakfast, then lunch, then dress two squirmy boys and be out the door for school all by 9:00 AM. I’m sure I’ll be tired then.
It’s worth it.
I’ve been working on a house since July that is every shade of cream, beige and gray that you can imagine with a bit of redwood, walnut and charcoal brown for contrast. It will be stunning when complete but I really need a shot of color.